My life changed when I started my blog and the story is really rather inspirational. I never really put the pieces together when I first began blogging, but sometimes you need distance from something in order to see the magic of it. I have been blogging for almost four years now, and I love it more than I ever thought I would.
My blogging story would be empty and inaccurate without mentioning the person who encouraged me to start one.
Iggy and I became friends fairly effortlessly. We both possess the gift of gab and our conversations are never dull. We also share a passion for movies (Iggy actually has a PhD in Cinema and Media Studies) and celebrities, and I recall spending many an afternoon breaking down the attractiveness quotient of Chris Hemsworth. Iggy was a supportive friend through all of my tortured dating and singleness sagas, and he also found a confidant and cheerleader in me.
I really don’t remember exactly what we were talking about on the day Iggy suggested I start a blog. However, I do recall that we were eating lunch together in a conference room and chatting about my life path. Iggy had just shamed me for the third time after I tried to steal pieces of his delicious food truck meal. He has a knack for choosing the best food on the menu, and I always liked his food way more than my own. Anyway, he was not having any of that, understandably, and I finally backed off.
PLANTING THE SEED
When Iggy mentioned I start a blog, I remember thinking he was truly nuts. I dismissed the idea immediately. Mostly because ever since the invention of blogs, I never really understood the point of them. Why would anyone want to read the mindless ramblings of another person’s inner thoughts? I certainly wasn’t interested in reading any blogs, so why would anyone be interested in reading mine? But Iggy really saw that I had much to say and lots of unique perspectives that he thought others would appreciate. He certainly valued my authentic voice, and he truly thought others would as well.
Iggy and I staring in wonder at the solar eclipse on August 21, 2017 in Philadelphia, PA.
Even though I completely dismissed Iggy’s suggestion in my mind, and to his face, I literally started a blog the next day. I didn’t know what I was doing, but I found that when I wrote my first article, SMOOTH SKIN FOR THE EVERYDAY GODDESS, the words just poured out of me. This process felt like such a release. I realize the topic of smooth skin comes across as rather empty (don’t judge, it was my first post), but I still felt my soul imbued in the process. To me, beauty and skincare are just as spiritual and substantial as something like the topic of forgiveness.
I will be forever grateful to Iggy for encouraging me to start this blog. The thought would have NEVER even occurred to me, and I thank Iggy for seeing my potential when I was not able.
Several months before Iggy and I had our blog conversation, I experienced a profound awakening in my dating life.
I had a series of short-lived, mini-relationships and dating situations in early 2017. Each experience offered invaluable learning opportunities, but were all nonetheless lame and ridiculous. Still, I trudged through and kept trying, making a date with a guy I had met in my yoga class as the summer months approached. He was a perfectly nice guy. However, after two dates, I just wasn’t feeling it and was beginning to think of men as pretty repulsive creatures.
After that date, I got in my car and just kind of started screaming to myself. I was angry and tired of feeling so powerless. And I realized in my five minute drive home that I had been giving my power over to men for pretty much my entire life. Even though, anyone who knew me would say that I was an incredibly powerful person. I am a relatively strong-willed and unique individual who doesn’t put up with anyone’s shit, for the most part. But when it came to men, my power went out the window, and I became a ghost of myself when in a man’s presence.
FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I FELT EMPOWERED BY THE IDEA OF NOT GIVING A SHIT WHETHER OR NOT MEN LIKED ME
This revelation was truly a game changer. The experience of the bad date + the car ride awakening + the creation of my blog all led to the profound need to prioritize myself in my own life. I have always been a master of self-advocacy in so many areas of my life. However, when it came to men, I would always defer to them and put myself second. Always.
During my pre-blog period, I started cutting snippets of words and inspirational phrases in order to create a vision board. My searching during this time really readied me for something new. I snipped these phrases just 10 days before I created my first blog post on July 17, 2017.
THE POWER OF BLOGGING
Blogging is an amazing tool to help me define who I am.
When I began blogging, I found myself writing about something and thinking, “I don’t care if someone likes this or not. This is how I feel, so it can’t be wrong.” And this attitude most certainly manifested in my dating life moving forward.
If a man was rude to me on a date, umm, buh-bye. “I have a blog bitch, and I know who I am!” Before my blog, I seriously never realized how meekly I behaved on dates. I was always accommodating and always wanting to make sure they were pleased, regardless of my own happiness or comfort level.
This is such a serious tendency that so many women struggle with in the dating world, and in relationships. I expand on this struggle in my article, GODDESS DATING GUIDELINES.
Several divine occurrences took place after I created my blog. And I do believe that each of these experiences led to love.
- I redecorated my apartment and made it more “guest-friendly” and cozy for others, as well as for myself.
- My mother passed away on December 20, 2017, closing one door and opening another.
- I received certified Reiki training, expanding my spiritual gifts and intuition.
- A series of health issues gave me increased perspective and healing and readied my body for what was to come.
I MET MY NOW PARTNER ON AUGUST 6, 2018, ABOUT ONE YEAR FROM WHEN I STARTED MY BLOG, AFTER SEARCHING FOR LOVE FOR CLOSE TO 20 YEARS.
The amazing thing about finding myself BEFORE I found love, is that I never lost myself once I found love. I had learned to love myself in a way I never had before, and my blog was the most invaluable tool to aid me in this process. Once this self-love was in place, nothing could really take that away. And this method of transformation ensured I found a partner who treated me with the respect I had already developed for myself.
MY CONTINUED BLOGGING JOURNEY
I often find that when I feel like shit about something, I blog about it and feel better. When my visual art is stuck and not exactly flowing, my blogging process fills that creative void. When I’m feeling silenced or disempowered about something, my blog gives me back my voice and makes me feel whole again. It’s like I have a strange imaginary friend in my blog and I can turn to it whenever I need to.
I honestly still don’t know where my blogging journey will take me, and sometimes this whole blog phenomenon still confuses me. But, it feels good, so Imma keep doing it.
Thank you to everyone who follows, likes, comments on, and enjoys my blog. Until next time…
Featured photo by Jordan Steranka on Unsplash
Blogger typing photo by Kaitlyn Baker on Unsplash