10 THINGS ABOUT ME THAT REALLY BOTHERED HIM

I’m feeling the need to write this post, because I’m still in an active grieving process. Grieving from being abruptly broken up with after three and a half years together. And after these four months, I’m still trying to pick up the pieces and make sense of the whole thing. So, as part of my healing journey, I’m wanting to make sure that I take some responsibility for myself. And I don’t want to just be a complete victim in the whole thing. Even though that’s 100% how I feel about it most of the time. And I don’t like this at all. But, no. It really takes two to tango. And we both made great contributions, as well as lots of mistakes. So, here’s my attempt at getting honest with myself, about the things about me that really bothered him. Continue reading 10 THINGS ABOUT ME THAT REALLY BOTHERED HIM

THE THINGS I’M FOCUSING ON NOW, OTHER THAN MEN

I know I recently declared that I’m now taking a deep dive into the dating apps. Since I was dumped a few months ago, and was feeling more ready to give dating a try. And I’m not saying I’m swearing off dating apps forever. I haven’t had terrible experiences since I got back on the apps. And there’s really no reason why I’m feeling inspired to put the apps down already. Other than the fact that I JUST DON’T WANT TO DATE RIGHT NOW. I’m just not feeling interested in men, or relationships, or romance, or sex, or flirting, or dating, or any of that stuff. Not at all. And it’s kind of wigging me out. Because this is all I’ve ever been interested in, ever. Since I was five years old! And this is the first time I’m really interested in things other than men. Continue reading THE THINGS I’M FOCUSING ON NOW, OTHER THAN MEN

ATTENTION MEN: BEAUTIFUL WOMEN HAVE PROBLEMS TOO

I was riding on the train this morning, on the way to work. And I’ll start off by saying that I consider myself to be a beautiful woman. I’m not sorry about it. And beautiful women should never apologize for their beauty, because they actually, really can’t help it. Although I do take care of myself, I honestly can’t take much credit for my beauty. Because I basically just lucked out in the gene pool, and that’s just kind of the way it goes. I won’t apologize for it, and I mostly just try to enjoy it while it lasts. Because I also know that my beauty, or I should say, the kind of beauty that is valued in our society, is literally fading with every passing day. And that’s totally okay too. However, I still feel radiant and beautiful most days, and today was no exception. Continue reading ATTENTION MEN: BEAUTIFUL WOMEN HAVE PROBLEMS TOO

THERE ARE OTHER KINDS OF VALUABLE INTELLIGENCES BESIDES THE PATRIARCHAL KIND

I will start off this post by saying that in no way am I knocking patriarchal intelligence. And if you don’t know what I mean by patriarchal intelligence, I’ll explain below. Please know that I believe there are all kinds of intelligences, and I think that all of them are valuable. And this article is more to express my frustration about the fact that patriarchal intelligence has historically received (and still receives) WAY more respect, throughout the entire globe, than most other kinds of intelligences. And it pisses me off. Continue reading THERE ARE OTHER KINDS OF VALUABLE INTELLIGENCES BESIDES THE PATRIARCHAL KIND

WHY I HATE BEING A WOMAN

This is the first of of my “Real and Raw” guest post series. And it’s coming from one of my favorite bloggers, K E Garland. I’ve been getting to know Kathy over the last few months, via our mutual blogs. And she’s just one of those bloggers that I can relate to. Where something she says makes me go, “Yep, yep.” And where her responses to my words make me feel validated and connected. I was secretly hoping she would submit something for this series, but of course, I didn’t want to push. Thankfully, I didn’t have to! And I think we can tell by this topic of “Why I Hate Being A Woman,” we are in for a real and raw treat! Continue reading WHY I HATE BEING A WOMAN

BEAUTIFUL THINGS MAKE ME HAPPY

I used to wonder about the purpose of beauty in the world. I know this sounds strange coming from an artist like myself. But, it’s true. And I would wonder (please pardon my momentary vanity) why I was allowed to be pretty in this world, when others were not granted the “pretty gene.” What purpose was this serving? More on that in a moment. And as an artist, although I definitely appreciate all the beauty that is found in art, I never thought it had the capacity to do much soul-saving in the world. Compared to something like music. However, lately, my feelings are changing. And I’m noticing, in both big and small ways, how much beautiful things make me happy. Continue reading BEAUTIFUL THINGS MAKE ME HAPPY

MAKING BEAUTIFUL ART ABOUT GRIEF AND LOSS IS REALLY HELPING

Loss is loss, and it doesn’t exactly matter what form it takes. And even though I’m surviving the loss of my romantic relationship, one month after he broke up with me, I’m still grieving hard core. And for whatever reason, I have been finding that making beautiful art about the death of my mother is really helping. Perhaps the sadness I’m feeling about losing my ex is bringing up unchecked emotions about the loss of my mother. Or, perhaps I just need a new way to grieve the loss of Mike, and making sad art about my mother is helping move those emotions along. Continue reading MAKING BEAUTIFUL ART ABOUT GRIEF AND LOSS IS REALLY HELPING

POWERFUL WOMEN NEED AND WANT LOVE TOO

Before I get into the topic of how and why powerful women need and want love too, let me start by saying that all women are powerful. All of them. Every last one of them. The passive housewife who has been “obedient” to her husband for her entire life is powerful. Women may not have been given proper opportunities to express their power, but it doesn’t mean they don’t have it. Continue reading POWERFUL WOMEN NEED AND WANT LOVE TOO

THANK YOU 2021 AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!

This is my last post of 2021. Because I try to practice goddess-esque living in all of my affairs. And taking a break, remaining present for joy, and pulling away for further reflection, are all super goddessy things. And as much as I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE blogging, I am also looking forward to spending a few weeks away. It’s kind of like when you’re in an awesome relationship. But you have plans to go away on vacation with friends. And as much as you love your partner, you also can’t wait to be away so you can fall back in love, and experience that longing again. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, it’s true. So, I am lovingly creating space between me and my beloved GA, for just a short time. In order to return with fresh and fully-formed, open insight, and feelings of galactic excitement to begin again! Continue reading THANK YOU 2021 AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!

LETTING GO OF PERFECTIONISM AS I FOCUS ON PROLIFIC ART-MAKING

Gosh, asking a Virgo to try letting go of perfectionism, is like asking a bee to stop making honey. It’s just what we do. And for the most part, even though it sounds like a curse, to live under the pressure of perfectionism, most Virgos prefer it. I think our perfectionism can be tied to our self-worth sometimes, unfortunately. And that’s never healthy. But honestly, it’s like we have an internal, built-in drive to just organize and arrange the world in a better way than it already is. It’s very satisfying to do this, actually. And man, do we have our work cut out for us! There are always projects, and tasks, and people to “fix”! And of course, there is also always beautiful art to be made. Continue reading LETTING GO OF PERFECTIONISM AS I FOCUS ON PROLIFIC ART-MAKING