1. Great big hugs to you, Libby 💜
    Grief is such a long and unpredictable journey. Five months might as well be five minutes. Grief jolts come out of nowhere. I’m glad you are embracing self-compassion and self-care.

    I took photos when I started crying last year. I was so shocked by my tears that I just grabbed my phone and started taking these out of focus and out of frame pics so I could look back and remember that I cried.

    1. Yes thank you for sharing how you took snaps of yourself as well! It just feels so surreal when it’s happening, it feels worth documenting. And there’s also a strange beauty in crying, so the artist in me wants to capture the essence of that as well. I wrote this post a few weeks ago and I’m having a nice week at least so far! So I’m enjoying that while I can. Thank you, Goddess! xoxox

  2. I just came back from a two week trip visiting each of my three older brothers across the country. (post to follow in a few days). My heart hurt when I saw the way one of my brothers was living. He had essentially isolated himself from others and his apartment was crammed to the gills with crap. There were many other issues too, but I won’t go into those due to privacy and space. I felt overwhelmed and a touch guilty for not knowing. I didn’t sleep well because it was so upsetting. I called my wife early the next morning, and I poured out my heart to her and cried. The situation is different from yours, but I was grieving. It was a necessary thing before I could move on. Instead of doing a bunch of fun things with him, I realized my time there could best be used to help him. We went out and bought him his first cellphone, and I began teaching him how to use it. While there are still plenty of necessary things to do (finding a new apartment and getting rid of a lot of stuff), I was still sad, but we’d taken some important first steps.

    My point is grieving is necessary before we can move on. There is no time table. I know you understand all this already, but you are completely normal still having these feelings. My best to you, Libby, as you navigate the inevitable sadness that comes from losing someone close.

    1. Thank you so much for sharing this Pete. And despite everything, I hope you enjoyed some of your trip as well. And I’m so sorry to hear about your brother, but it also sounds like he’s lucky to have you! I’m also glad you were able to cry with your wife and just let it all out. So healthy and great, even tho I’m sure it felt wretched. Sending good vibes to your brother and hoping he’s going to be okay. And welcome back home! I’m looking forward to seeing that post 😊

  3. I feel your pain! I remember this one day a few months into my last break – when watching the sunset alone in my apartment just made me realise that I’ll never watch a beautiful sunset with him. I broke down and called my best friend, who was with me on the phone for an hour to just let me know that I’m not alone. Argh. Break ups suck!
    Grieving and crying is so helpful in putting the past behind us. So grieve and just take out all the pain, so that you can leave it behind in the past.

    I used to wonder if there’ll ever come a day when I’ll wake up and he (my ex) won’t be my first thought in the morning. And then that day came and I didn’t even realise till a few days into not thinking about him that I wasn’t thinking about him. I hope you reach that stage soon. ❤️

    1. Yes thank you Moksha! And I wrote this post several weeks ago and I’ve been feeling so much better even now. Time is such the ultimate healer. But also so comforting to hear your experiences, even tho I’m sorry u had to got through that! But it just shows us what we really want and deserve 💖

  4. Your tear picture is so intriguing and evocative, and this feels weird to say, but beautiful. I think it’s the authenticity and vulnerability of it – it hits me in the heart.

    I have never thought to take a picture of myself crying, but I cry ugly.

    1. You might be and look more beautiful than you realize! And yes I felt inspired to snap a pic because I feel like the act of crying is kind of beautiful in and of itself, regardless of how it “looks”. Thank so much for commenting and please do let me know if you end up snapping a pic of yourself the next time. You might find it makes you want to give yourself a big hug 😭💖🌺 seeing yourself on that state from the outside looking in

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